Identity 

Identity: Who am I?

How would children and teens you know answer this key question representing our need for identity? How would you like them to be able to answer it? How do you answer it?

Identity is the key to our behavior - who we think we are is who we will be. Therefore, it's very important. Everyone's identity should be current, accurate (the question is not "Who was I?), complete (e.g., based on more than our appearance), and more positive than negative (we must know our weaknesses that could be improved). We teach about positive self-talk, complimenting and correcting others, and the process of change. We include information about positive identities (e.g., we're one-of-a-kind unique miracles and smart in many ways). We'll include cautions about listening to the wrong people and being controlled by a past-tense, incomplete, too negative, or inaccurate identity.

Teens and children without healthy identity tend to exhibit a variety of negative behaviors. They give excuses, blame others, deny responsibility, are very sensitive to criticism, put others down, bully others, and might cry with little reason.