| from Stephen Baker | 


An interesting study can be made by looking at the passages in Colossians and Ephesians that lead into the sections about marriage relationships. For example, Colossians 3:18-19 is a brief exhortation to wives and husbands. This is preceded by a passage encouraging Christian character. We understand that character is developed first and tested most in the home and the marital relationship. 

Ephesians 5:22-33 is the passage most quoted in reference to marriage relationships, but have you ever connected the preceding thoughts to it? Verses 15-21 give a great exposition of the duties people should implement into their lives if they want to be spiritually awake and alert to the world and needs around them – successful as “children of the light.” (Eph. 3:8-14) This is best practiced within the marriage. 

Those duties are as follows: 

  •  Seek wisdom from the Lord for the age in which we live. Seek God’s will. Vs. 15-17 
  • This is not as complicated as we make it out to be. Live in peace, be thankful, work with your own hands, if you see a need – meet it, love the Lord and love others, resist the devil, etc. 
  • Seek the anointing and filling of the Holy Spirit. Vs. 18 
  • We will either be controlled by our fleshly desires, sinful addictions, or spiritual oppression from darkness, or we will walk in the light of God’s Word and fellowship. Choose to walk in fellowship with the Lord in His Word. 
  • Seek to encourage and build up others around us. Vs. 19-21 
  • We are made for relationships and we can either discourage or encourage. We can complain or be grateful. We can pout or praise. 

When we apply these simple but profound truths within our marriage, practicing God’s graciousness, we will see much greater joy and success in that relationship. We will also be better equipped to deal with the lost world around us. 


Stephen Baker and his wife, Joyce have been two of Dr. Kathy’s thought-leaders for years. Now they’re both Celebrate Kids Associate Speakers and Writers. They work closely together. Steve has served in ministry for almost 40 years. With his heart for discipleship, he has worked as a senior pastor, associate pastor, teacher, coach, and hospice chaplain. Steve has a passion for families, mentoring believers, and discipling parents to walk in this world humbly and boldly as warriors sharing the powerful message of the gospel to all people.