Last Monday, I encouraged readers to consider what they value for them and their children. I provided a list of words for you to consider.
I certainly don’t want you or your children to be unhappy. I’ll choose happiness over misery or just that “blah” feeling every time. Yet, motivation for the post and word list was birthed in my concern that happiness is often prioritized. When that’s the case, unwise decisions may be made more often just to keep kids happy.
Upon reflection and a great insight from Randy Thomas, our Online Content and Social Media Manager, we can do that with any of the words I listed. If you chose your ten words, consider my examples here and look at your list to see if anything may be skewed in unhealthy ways. If you haven’t chosen your ten words, you may want to do that now.
- If you value peace for your children., that doesn’t mean you avoid all potential conflict just so peace rules. Your children wouldn’t learn how to handle conflict well.
- If you want your children to have answers, that doesn’t mean you drop everything to always answer their questions. If you do, they may think they’re the center of the universe because whatever they ask and whenever they ask, you immediately stop what you’re doing and meet their needs. Also, they may not learn how to think and process independently.
- You want your children to experience affection. Yet you don’t want them to try to earn it through what they do. The same thing is true for love.
- You may want your children to be creative and inventive. Perhaps you enjoyed creating games when you were a child. Maybe you remember inventing things with rubber bands and clothespins and you want your kids to have similar fun experiences. That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t face appropriate consequences if they ruin good dishes when inventing something or draw on your living room wall when creating art.
I trust these examples got you thinking. Getting our priorities and motivations right and healthy is one of the more important things we do. As we regularly examine our own lives, we can also observe children to see what they emphasize and why. Start a conversation and keep it going. Bless you!