Last Monday I blogged Your Children Are Watching, about the importance of teaching our children and being role models of how we want them to behave. As I write in my new book, Start with the Heart, “Be who you want your children to be and teach them who you want them to be. Much is caught and taught. Want them to be successful.” (page 21)

Is there a new behavior you’d love your children to embrace? A new character quality to exhibit? Maybe there’s a new attitude or belief that would bless them (and, therefore, you, too). This means there’s something currently going on that’s not healthy. They need to stop that as they start doing something new to become someone new.

Stop hate. Start love.

Stop apathy. Start interest and concern.

Stop perfectionism. Start striving for excellence and progress.

Stop disrespect. Start respect.

Stop procrastination. Start timely action.

Stop cheating. Start honesty.

Stop believing “I’m worthless.” Start believing “I’m worth Jesus dying for.”

You get the idea.

A heart for you and for God makes changes like these more likely. When we’re consistent in our modeling of what we want children to do and who we want them to be and when we teach clearly and specifically, children learn they can trust us. Our consistency and integrity makes change easier for them. Changes will probably last longer, too.

Change → Exchange → Transformation

We want our children to do more than change. We want them to make an exchange. We want it to be permanent. I’m describing transformation. As I write on page, 33, “Transformation happens as character is caught and taught.”

Transformation requires a “change in form.” It’s what happens when a caterpillar morphs into a butterfly. It’s a wonderful process. It’s planned, purposeful, and strategic. Transformation is a permanent change. The butterfly doesn’t change back into a caterpillar.

What can you do to help your children permanently change and leave their old ways behind them? Dream of it – your children making permanent transformational changes from “this” to “that.” You can do more than dream.

Model what you want them to do.

Model who you want them to be.

Teach them what you want them to do.

Teach them who you want them to be.

Why did I write Start with the Heart? I want parents to successfully help their children make permanent changes. You can work to transform your children’s attitudes, behaviors, actions, and beliefs. Truths in the book will help you.

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Start with the Heart:
How to Motivate Your Kids to be Compassionate, Responsible, and Brave (Even When You’re Not Around).
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