Helping Our Children Thrive in a “Crisis of Place”
If you’ve ever been stuck inside with your kids on a rainy day, you know that the environment around them really matters. One minute, they’re building a blanket fort. The next? They're wrestling in it like it’s WrestleMania. And you're Googling “quiet indoor activities for kids before mom loses her mind.”
Let’s talk about something beautiful and big-hearted: kids thrive in conducive environments. That sounds fancy, but really, it’s this—kids grow best where they feel free to explore, move, imagine, and belong.
And maybe that’s not a Pinterest-worthy homeschool nook or a magical forest trail—it might just be your living room rearranged to host a cardboard spaceship or a kitchen where your child finally gets to crack the eggs, even if most end up on the floor. These little shifts can make a big impact.
Why "Place" Matters
In a recent podcast conversation with Dr. Kathy, she described something that hit home: our kids are often experiencing a crisis of place. They’re in spaces not built for them—parking lots, classrooms that feel more like waiting rooms, screen-heavy schedules that say “sit still” when every part of them says “explore!”
Kids are wired to wonder, move, and make. When they’re stuck in environments that say “don’t touch,” “stay quiet,” or “keep scrolling,” their joy shrinks and their behavior can start to slide. Not because they’re “bad kids,” but because their surroundings are out of sync with their God-designed curiosity.
Maybe your child melts down in the grocery store or becomes a total tornado by dinnertime. That’s not random—it’s often a signal they’re missing purpose or a sense of belonging.
Home Can Be the Launchpad
Now, before you start redecorating, take a breath. You don’t need to overhaul your life to make it a more “conducive environment.” It starts with how you see the space your child lives in—and how you see your child.
Some kids are builders, while others are dreamers. Some need rhythm and structure (hello, color-coded charts!), while others thrive in a swirl of creativity and spontaneity. The point? When we tune in to how our children tick, we can shape their environment to meet them where they are and help them flourish.
Let’s be real: this is where it gets tricky. You might be a planner who loves a clean house and checklists (hello, timeline and goal setters!), while your child thrives in messy play and spontaneous singing. You might be all about big-picture vision and deep conversations, and your kid just wants to know when snack time is.
Guess what? That’s beautiful. You were made differently. And together, you help each other grow.
Three Simple Steps to Create a Place Where Kids Thrive:
Observe Without Judgment
What makes your child come alive? What spaces make them shut down? Don’t label their responses as “good” or “bad.” Just notice. Awareness is your superpower.Adapt One Environment
Choose one area to shift this week. Maybe it’s the kitchen counter becoming an art station after school. Maybe it’s letting them read under the table with a flashlight. Start small. Watch their eyes light up.Name the Belonging
Kids need to hear that they belong. Say things like: “I love how you fill this space with your creativity,” or “You are such an important part of our home.” Words build place, too.
Let’s Get Even More Personal: How to Support Your Kids Through the 8 Great Smarts
Dr. Kathy Koch explains that every child is smart in different ways. When you lean into how your child is wired, you’re not just making a fun environment—you’re shaping identity and building belonging. Here’s how to support your child based on the 8 Great Smarts:
Word Smart: Talk it out! Let them name how a space makes them feel. Journal with them. Create a “place poem” together.
Logic Smart: Ask them to help redesign their room or a play area with a purpose—what’s working, what’s not?
Picture Smart: Give them art supplies or let them take photos of their favorite spots. Ask what they’d create if they could build the perfect play space.
Music Smart: Create playlists together for different places in your home. Turn cleanup time into a dance party.
Body Smart: Let them climb, jump, stretch, and sprawl. Build obstacle courses or simply allow furniture forts.
Nature Smart: Explore outside—even if it’s just collecting rocks in the backyard or naming clouds. Nature is the original conducive environment!
People Smart: Involve them in team projects—building a family snack zone, creating welcome signs for guests, or organizing a game night.
Self Smart: Give them time alone in quiet places where they can reflect or read. Ask questions that help them understand their preferences and emotions.
Remember, you don’t need to create a perfect home or have endless energy. You just need a little intentionality, a lot of grace, and the courage to let your child thrive in a place where they feel seen, loved, and free to be themselves.