When February Hits: Helping Your Kids Climb Out of the MidWinter Slump
Every year it happens. February rolls in. The sky turns gray. The snow lingers. The motivation dips. Teachers push hard academically. Spring break feels far away. Sunlight is scarce. Everyone is tired.
And suddenly your cheerful child feels flat. Grades dip. Attitudes shift. Conversations shorten.
You ask, “How was your day?”
“Fine.” “What was the best part?” “Nothing.” And now you’re wondering, is this a slump? Is this something deeper? Or am I just not connecting well anymore?
Let’s slow this down.
Before You Panic, Consider Biology
In 1 Kings 19, the prophet Elijah crashes. He is overwhelmed and afraid. And God’s first response isn’t a lecture. It’s sleep and food. Before addressing Elijah’s theology, God addresses his biology.
Sometimes February isn’t a spiritual crisis. It’s fatigue. Less sunlight impacts mood. Academic pressure builds. Sleep deficits accumulate. Families feel cooped up. Before you overanalyze your child’s one word answers, ask:
Are they tired?
Are they hungry?
Have they moved today?
Have they seen sunlight?
Sometimes connection begins with a snack and a walk, not a deep question.
Conversation Matters, But Timing Matters More
Asking, “What was the best part of your day?” is fine. But for some kids, “best” feels overwhelming. Try: “What’s one good thing that happened today?” Or even: “I bet some parts of your day were better than others.”
That statement often invites more response than a question. And when they answer, even briefly, resist the interrogation.
Instead of: “What happened? Why? Who said that? What did you do?” Try: “Tell me more.” Those three words open doors.
What If They Snap Back?
This is where many parents quietly spiral. You ask a thoughtful question. They roll their eyes. They sigh. They dismiss you.
And suddenly you feel like:
You’re not good at this.
You’ve lost connection.
It’s better not to try.
Pause.
February is hard on everyone. Moodiness does not equal relational failure. Sometimes your child isn’t rejecting you. They’re depleted. And sometimes they’ve used all their words at school.
Not All Kids Connect Through Words
Some children process verbally. Others process physically. If your son talks more while throwing a football than sitting at a table, that’s not a deficiency. Its design.
Often, kids tend to be shoulder-to-shoulder communicators. Drive in the car. Shoot hoops. Walk the dog. Work on a project. Connection often flows sideways rather than face-to-face.
And if your child gives one word answers? Make it a game. Roll a die. Whatever number appears is how many things they must share about their day. When it feels playful, it feels safer.
Shift the Focus from Self to Service
Mid year slumps often turn kids inward. We can gently widen the lens. Instead of only asking: “What would have made your day better?” Try: “Could you have done anything to make someone else’s day better?” Or: “Did you notice if anyone else had a hard day?”
Shifting from self-focus to service builds resilience. And resilience fights a slump.
Build Something to Look Forward To
February needs anticipation. Have a Friday night family ritual. Create a February tradition. Predictable joy stabilizes mood. Kids thrive when they know something good is coming. It doesn’t need to be extravagant. It needs to be intentional.
Don’t Forget the Core Needs
When your child feels flat, ask which core need might be low:
Security, Do they feel safe and steady?
Identity, Do they feel seen?
Belonging, Do they feel connected?
Purpose: Do they have something meaningful?
Competence: Are they experiencing success?
Sometimes a slump is simply a need that hasn’t been noticed. Meet the need before correcting the mood.
Using the 8 Great Smarts to Fight the February Slump
Every child climbs out of a slump differently. Lean into their design.
Word Smart - Journal one good thing daily. Play word games. Let them process verbally.
Logic Smart - Explain how sunlight, sleep, and movement affect mood. Make the slump understandable.
Picture Smart - Create a visible countdown to spring break or a fun event.
Music Smart - Play upbeat music during homework. Add a winter playlist to shift the atmosphere.
Body Smart - Prioritize movement. Even 15 minutes outside changes brain chemistry.
Nature Smart - Get outside intentionally, even in cold weather. Nature regulates emotion.
People Smart - Schedule a friend hangout. Belonging combats slump faster than lectures.
Self Smart - Encourage reflection: “What do you notice about your energy lately?”
Remember: February slumps are real. They are not proof that you’re failing as a parent. They are invitations. Invitations to slow down. To nourish bodies. To strengthen the connection. To build anticipation. Sometimes the bright light that cuts through the dark isn’t a deep conversation. It’s a warm meal. A walk in the cold air. A planned moment of joy. And your steady presence.