Helping Our Children Think for Themselves in a Culture of Quick Answers

Something amazing happened when I introduced a problem to my class.

There were no screens before them. No apps. Just pencils, paper, and a problem to solve. The energy shifted. Kids furrowed their brows. They smirked at each other. They asked deeper questions. Something important was happening. They were thinking. Not copy-and-pasting. They weren’t searching for a shortcut. They were doing the mental lifting we all did before AI and autocomplete became our everyday helpers.

And I loved it.

Today’s kids are growing up in a world where information is fast, answers are suggested before the question is finished, and creativity can be outsourced to a machine. Artificial intelligence is incredible, and yes, I use it too. But we have to ask: What happens when kids grow up never learning to struggle through a problem? What if they stop believing they can?

That’s not just about productivity. It’s about identity.

When we rob our kids of cognitive struggle, we rob them of something sacred: the ability to think deeply, independently, and confidently. The ability to lead with original ideas, not just recycle someone else’s.

Dr. Kathy recently shared her heart on this. “I can be pretty terrified almost when I think about a world without thinkers.” She’s not afraid of AI. She’s concerned about apathy. If kids aren’t trained to ask good questions, they’ll never arrive at wise conclusions. They’ll critique, not create. Follow, not lead.

That’s why one of the most important things we can do is hand them a pen, a hard question, and the space to wrestle.

In an age of Google Docs and grammar-correcting keyboards, we forget the gift of handwriting. There’s neuroscience behind it; writing helps us believe what we’re thinking, because our brains and bodies are more fully engaged. But there’s also something spiritual. Slowness invites connection.

When my students sat with paper, they weren’t just solving a marketing challenge; they were connecting. With each other. With their thoughts. With me. We paused to unpack a sentence that one student struggled to write. We laughed and listened. We learned.

That doesn’t happen in a group chat. Where Technology says, “Let’s Zoom instead,” our souls scream, “No…let’s commit to visit in person.”

Whether it’s flying across the country to have lunch with a mentor or driving across town to visit an aunt, in-person time matters, Dr. Kathy reminds us, “People matter. And if you’re a Christ-follower, you can’t get away from that.” Our kids need to see that relationships aren’t just efficient, they’re formative. Kids today are starved for that kind of belonging.

It can be helpful to consider this entire theme in light of what God does with Jacob in Genesis 32. God didn’t give Jacob an instant download. He gave him a nighttime wrestling match. Why? Because effort forms identity. Sweat builds character. Perseverance creates readiness. Struggle galvanizes resiliency and commitment.

Your kids don’t just need answers. They need struggle. They need to be trusted with hard questions and messy middle moments. They need to write, not just tap. Think, not just swipe. Wrestle, not just receive.

Struggle isn’t the enemy of identity. Sometimes, it’s the birthplace of it.

All this considered, you don’t need to be anti-technology to raise thinkers. You just need to be intentional. Create space for your kids to think out loud, write by hand, sit in silence, and stretch their creative muscles.

Talk about what matters. Make time for people. Resist the urge to speed up. Stop being so focused on efficiency, and remember that slow thinking is often strong thinking.

Want a simple place to start? Try this: Pick one task this week and do it the “long” way with your kids. No shortcuts. Talk as you go. Ask, “What would you do here?” Watch how their confidence grows.

How to Engage Your Kids with the 8 Great Smarts:

People Smart: Host a tech-free dinner. Let your kids read facial expressions, share stories, and reflect on body language together. Talk about how in-person relationships shape who we are.

Logic Smart: Give your kids a real-world problem to solve, without tech. Maybe it’s planning a trip, organizing a room, or comparing prices. Let them struggle through it.

Picture Smart: Invite your child to draw what “thinking” looks like to them; maybe a maze, a wrestling match, or a lightbulb turning on. Let it spark a deeper conversation.

Music Smart: Explore how music can be written, not just streamed. Can they compose a short melody? Record their own lyrics about their thoughts?

Body Smart: Take a walk without earbuds. Talk about what you notice. Let movement unlock thoughts that can’t be accessed on a screen.

Nature Smart: Ask your kids how nature problem-solves. How do plants grow around rocks? How do birds build shelters? God built thinking into creation.

Word Smart: Encourage handwritten journaling or note-taking during devotions, schoolwork, or church. Ask them how writing helps them process.

Self Smart: Let your child reflect on when they feel most confident thinking on their own. Ask, “What helps you feel smart? What makes you shut down?”

Remember, our kids don’t need all the answers. But they do need the courage to ask good questions and the confidence to wrestle through them. When we slow down, show up, and push them to think, we’re not just teaching skills; we’re shaping identity.